First post again :)
It's great to be back. I re-added several blogs, which I were subscribed earlier, to my RSS feed and I feel really excited. I love to read all about other guys and it helps me a lot. First - because I feel accepted and not so different after all. Second because a lot of other guys are thinking like I do or think very similar.
I love to blog, but the reason why I don't keep this one up-to-date is because of my English. I need to think hard to write in English, but I hope that it will be better and better. But the point is that I'm improving it every day.
Just because of this reason please know that while I'm typing, maybe I didn't meant something that is written, or I didn't have words to say what I intended to say.
Oh, now I read my previous posts and I noticed that I never write what happened with my "love" with D.
Lol, D. is part of my past. He's very egocentric as I said in some post; he's jerk with all adjectives considering that word. I don't know why I liked him so much, he is sexy and cute but he's an idiot.
I'm moving on... After him, like I said I was confused with my sexuality, cause I never tried anything with some boy and I asked myself: 'How can I know am I really gay or not?' When I watch porn or some nude pictures or men's bodies, they really turn me on,but the porns, the pictures and the bodies of girls does that too. That's why I categorize myself as bisexual, but after him I wasn't sure. I don't know was I blinded by him or what, but I felt gayer when I had crush on him. Now I feel straighter :) (I don't even know does this adjective exist in English), and I'm not having crush on any girl right now. There're a lot of cuties around me, male and female, but I've never been attracted to any guy before as I was attracted by D. YET! I'm opened for new challenges and for the new pain :) from boys and from girls :)...
You don't know how much I would like to try something out with some boy, just to be sure is it same as with girls. Maybe I will have chance during summer time, cause I'm going on some island with some friends. Well, that's small problem, cause no one knows about my sexuality, but I will try my best in hiding this potential adventure with some boy. It will be secret and with that fact it will be even more interesting :) I'm adventurer, just for the record.
In my life right now there's nothing special at all. It's all about school and I'm senior year and I can't wait until I finish. I will probably be sad because of my friends, because the most part of my class goes to different universities and we won't see each other so often, but I think that I will continue to hang out with people who really means me a lot (true friends) although there's a fact that we are probably going to the different university.
Oh, yeah, the university. I should write about that more. But as I'm keeping my name and my residence as secret you will probably wait until I figure out what I can say and what I cannot to you and other readers. Why? Because I don't want to risk anything to be revealed to the persons who might know me in person. I am a bit paranoid, but you can never know who is reading.
I don't really know why I am so secret and mysterious, but one of the reasons is fear of revealing. I really don't want that for now. I hope that you understand...
Thanks for reading :)
Just because of this reason please know that while I'm typing, maybe I didn't meant something that is written, or I didn't have words to say what I intended to say.
Oh, now I read my previous posts and I noticed that I never write what happened with my "love" with D.
Lol, D. is part of my past. He's very egocentric as I said in some post; he's jerk with all adjectives considering that word. I don't know why I liked him so much, he is sexy and cute but he's an idiot.
I'm moving on... After him, like I said I was confused with my sexuality, cause I never tried anything with some boy and I asked myself: 'How can I know am I really gay or not?' When I watch porn or some nude pictures or men's bodies, they really turn me on,
You don't know how much I would like to try something out with some boy, just to be sure is it same as with girls. Maybe I will have chance during summer time, cause I'm going on some island with some friends. Well, that's small problem, cause no one knows about my sexuality, but I will try my best in hiding this potential adventure with some boy. It will be secret and with that fact it will be even more interesting :) I'm adventurer, just for the record.
In my life right now there's nothing special at all. It's all about school and I'm senior year and I can't wait until I finish. I will probably be sad because of my friends, because the most part of my class goes to different universities and we won't see each other so often, but I think that I will continue to hang out with people who really means me a lot (true friends) although there's a fact that we are probably going to the different university.
Oh, yeah, the university. I should write about that more. But as I'm keeping my name and my residence as secret you will probably wait until I figure out what I can say and what I cannot to you and other readers. Why? Because I don't want to risk anything to be revealed to the persons who might know me in person. I am a bit paranoid, but you can never know who is reading.
I don't really know why I am so secret and mysterious, but one of the reasons is fear of revealing. I really don't want that for now. I hope that you understand...
Thanks for reading :)
Your English is better than the writing of some native-speakers, haha. Don't worry about typos too much, they'll improve in time.
ReplyDeleteMy one question to you right now, have you done anything with a girl to "confirm" that "part" of you? I understand why it's confusing for you, as I'm confused myself (about myself) as well, haha. I hope we figure it out!
What do you plan on doing over the summer to help figure things out? I suppose I'll read about it in time. :)
I totally understand your desire to be secretive and anonymous, it sucks to be outed without you knowing. Besides, it makes you a little mysterious. ;-)
What do you mean with "anything" from the sentence 'have you done anything with a girl to "confirm" that "part" of you?'And about summer, you'll find out for sure!
ReplyDeleteWhat I meant was, have you done anything sexually with a girl (e.g. kissed, made out, had sex, etc). So have you done anything sexually to confirm that you do, indeed, like and are attracted to women. That's all. :P
ReplyDeleteOf course I did and I'm enjoying it very much! :) But I wish that I can try something like that with some boy, some sexy and cute boy. But here, that's too risky, but how knows...
ReplyDeleteInteresting blog. I'm on it!
ReplyDeleteLunario
You are wise not to disclose very much detail about yourself until you are sure it is safe. Some people in large cities say what city they are in, because that isn't enough to let people recognize them.
ReplyDeleteBut there are two things to think about. One is being recognized by someone you know. The other is having a stalker find you and make things difficult. So that is why it's good not to tell too much.