First Gay Break Up

First, a huge apologise for not posting in a while, honestly I didn't have the inspiration to write and I noticed that my English became ever rustier than before, and yes, I was lazy...

I will be quick, this will be a quick update, cause I'm bit tired and bored and I would like to lay down on my bed for a moment after publishing this.

I broke up with V. Well, he broke up with me, we were together for only two weeks and we were talking to each other a lot more... He broke up with me because of my physical looks and because he didn't felt that this relationship will be for long time, he searches for something else. He's kinda hyper and unstable and he wants someone who will make him calm :-) and he doesn't like the fact I'm bit unexperienced. There is maybe something else, I can feel it, but he didn't told me. Maybe I was boring to him or something, dunno, and now I don't care. He told me that I was great and very dear person and we stayed in touch... From now on we are friends :-) and I'm fine by that. He's a good person, when he wishes to be, and I don't regret anything doing with him. We didn't came to sex part, but we tried oral sex for a short time, and I don't like it. It was fun kissing a boy and I liked it... I'm grateful to him for opening this chapter of my life and for being good, slow and honest from the start. I'm really satisfied with my first gay experience... and I feel more free... and liberated...

And now disclaimer for my physical looks. I'm not that bad. I'm bit skinny, true, and not in shape now, but he wanted someone with more muscles and stuff like that, and I understood him. I had better body one year ago, when I was training actively and when I was going in gym, but now, after a year of drinking and not doing anything with exercises I get rusty... But I started going to pool and doing my swimming hours two times a week (omg, I missed swimming A LOT and I really enjoyed swimming last week) and I'm planning to start with gym soon. I regularly ride my bike and I think that I'm very athletic, but obviously not enough for V.

Well, I'm not that down because he broke up with me for such a stupid reason, I was down cause I get easily attached to people and usually get hurt, and I know that I need to be careful to whom I'm giving my heart, but I don't care, I usually see good in people and I'm very optimistic and happy person. I was hurt a lot of times before and I'm ready to be hurt again. V. hurt me, because I was starting to fall in love with him, or maybe I was just thinking that I started to fall in love with him, cause he was my first experience and I was kinda only excited cause I will be with a guy and was blinded by that. I knew it from the beginning that he's kinda "difficult" personality, but I was ignoring that but in the same time, I was preparing myself for this break up cause I knew that it will come to this, from the start, but I had hopes that everything will be okay. And all became clear to me when I cooled down from V.

Now, after few days of moaning, I'm okay and I started chatting with Mike again, and soon after breakup, in the moment of sadness I tried to get over V. by meeting up in person with Mike... And I did meet Mike in person, and OMG, I stopped thinking about V. after seeing Mike approaching and offering his hand for handshake... Then I saw Mike one more time, two days ago after some clubbing and we became really close, even though we know each other for such a short time (chatting more than two months online) and after two "dates"... At our first date, after only two minutes, I had a feeling that I know him for a very long time. And the story kinda has sense when you know what we both experienced, but I can't reveal that details yet. He's so FREAKING cute!!! And hot and good person, and I really like him.

I know, I'm maybe a bitch and mean person, because after two days from my breakup I ended meeting another guy, but V. get over me even sooner, I noticed that he was logged on that dating site few days before we "officially" broke up even though we agreed that we won't go on that site and we won't meet with another people. But never mind now... I still have good thoughts about him... He is difficult and different person from me, but I understand him and I still care about him (now as friends)...

Okay, and btw, today is Mike's birthday, he's officially 21... :-) And we are texting each other like crazy... I think that this relationship or something will be way more better than mine and V.'s... I like Mike more as a person... V. was just my punching step into gay world, and that's why I cared a lot about him, probably...

That will be all for now... Thanks for reading... I'm hoping that you are doing great, too...?!

I decided that I will be answering the questions differently from now on (I mean on 'Ask Me Anything' posts). I will answer all questions asked for example in April at the beginning of May in one single post, and so on...

Take care and be safe...

B.

P.S. Sorry because there is no any hot pictures, but I really don't have time to put them now... :-)