Stay tuned... 2013 is coming

Hey everybody. :)

 

How are you? I’m bit in pain because I had my nose done. I had some problem with breathing (and yes, with snoring :P) and I finally, after three years of making myself do it, I went to hospital one day few months ago, got examined and I finished with having a surgery on Friday, the 28th of December.

I feel amazing and relaxed, I still can’t breathe through my nose, but I will take the bandages off on Thursday and I can’t wait to see how everything went. No pain, no gain, right?

 

Let's review the year 2012 and the past few months...

 



 

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Budapest - part 2012

Hey.

I successfully applied for scholarship and I got one. I'm now senior year and I started my classes two weeks ago and I was very busy past few months, like crazy-busy.

I'm still with N. and I'm very happy :), we even said "I love you" part. I'm spending like 4 out of 7 days a week at his place and I can't explain in simple words how I feel... 

He's amazing, comforting, smart, adoring, super hot and so on. I got totally used to him and after almost 9 months of beautiful relationship I can say that we are really close now and true couple. I will try to talk more about him later. (just for the record, I'm typing this from his computer while he's taking a shower... I'm spending night here cause the train to Budapest is tomorrow early early in the morning. He even kinda said 'hi' to "my readers" even though I didn't gave him a link for the blog, but he knows and respects my privacy. I told you he's amazing.)

Budapest...

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My crappy writing

Rereading my blog, I noticed that I repeat myself constantly and that I don't think too much when I write; I just write. Which is wrong. I'm not a good writer and some posts sound so fucking pathetic.

Since this moment, I will try to improve my writing and to become more dedicated to writing than ever.

I even thought about deleting all the previous posts and start over, but I will lose precious past records, so I will just start new ones and pay less attention to my stupid old nonsense posts before.

That's all. Nothing special in my life, I'm still stuck with exams, so I didn't have time to live properly, and I will update later. I'm chasing scholarship and I will be probably getting back to Budapest and maybe visiting Berlin for the first time in some future period. But I will tell you more about it when I know something more for sure.

Thanks for reading and for putting up with me all this time.
B.

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Smiling All The Way and Bloggers Friendship

I’ve finally opened the Twitter account for this blog, or for my alter ego online, and I decided to invest more in this blog, as you have noticed (I hope) I bought a domain name.

Exams are over, my relationship with N. is making me smile a lot :D, I enjoy every moment of it and we started great. We are together for three months and counting, and I’m falling for him really hard!

Yesterday we were at a party and we see each other almost every day. He’s sometimes really busy, cause he works on his job. I noticed that I really started carrying a lot for him. He’s amazing person, so smart, intelligent, interesting, beautiful, cute, funny, well-built, so stable, and so mature, well he’s 28, and what did you expect. He’s that kind of person who shows his affection with “deeds” and not “words” and I like that a lot on him. I like him just the way he is. He’s so sincere, so carrying and loyal. Wow! I’m bit scared to write about him, cause I don’t want to put a jinx on him :P I’m kidding a bit, but as so far, he’s so adorable. And he's the person who makes me have a smile on my face for no reason.

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Sexual Attraction

Recently I’ve stumbled upon a great website for writing and I was checking the forums and topics and found one interesting and very popular at the time.

It was about sexual attractions and it was asked by an asexual person, who doesn't feel sexual attraction and because it’s really common thing, she/he wants to write about it and wanted to hear opinions of how it’s like to be sexually attracted to someone.

Than the topic made me think about how easy we put aside some stuff which is happening around us. Like for that guy/girl, we think that sexual desire is common thing and believe me, it was a great challenge to write how you feel and express your personal experience of the feeling.

As for me, as an emotional person, I think that sexual desire is much more than just pleasing yourself and making your needs fulfilled. Sometimes I caught myself enjoying a lot more when I realize I make my partner enjoy and when I hear his sighing next to my ear. It’s not just “taking a bite of a delicious fruit” and putting it aside like some object when you taste it. It’s a mutual feeling. Sometimes when you feel attracted to someone and when he answers your moves or your looks, it makes you feel really good, feel wanted, feel great. Also, playing intellectual seducing games also counts a lot, at least for me. Everyone has his own perception of feeling excited and aroused, as for anything else in life which we feel.

Sometimes the sexual desire makes us do crazy and things we thought we would never do. It makes us question who we really are and why do we feel this way toward someone.

What do you think about the topic? How would you describe your sexual attraction feeling? Can someone realize what is sexual desire if he or she never experienced nor felt it?

As for asexuality, through my life I think I met a few asexual persons, and I'm very interested in their personality and how they think and behave. Sometimes I think they are calm and "without worries" but sometimes I think they miss a lot in their life. But as long as they are happy and enjoys other stuff more, I'm happy for them too :)

Thanks for reading. Can't wait to hear your thought on the subject...

B.

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Spring (Butterfly) Time

New Year passed... January passed... February passed... Winter passed... My birthday passed (I'm 22 now)... Spring came... Butterflies came... :)

How are you all? I've missed you and I hate apologizing over and over again when I disappear and when I appear again, so I won't do that.

I'm right now in an office where I "work" (volunteer to be precise). It's an office for international cooperation, mobilities and scholarships/exchange for students, well, actually the office is not strictly for that, I just work in that area. It's really fun to work here and I feel important when I sit in a chair in my separate office, drinking tea (I don't like coffee) and typing, talking with students and making jokes with my office colleagues.

Beside this "work" I do another real work where I earn money, not much, but for a student it's okay to have his own separate money and to enjoy life more. I designed and I'm managing a site for a travel agency and I earn 150€ monthly. Later, the boss even proposed me to start working on holidays, to guide tours and stuff like that, which I would really like, cause I will have a chance to travel and to practice languages more.

Nothing much in my life. Mom is okay, she finished with treating the cancer recently and she was through 30 procedures with radiation and she's still at home, relaxing and waiting for control in a few weeks. But I hope that everything is/will be fine. She feels fine and looks better.

I found a new boyfriend, in a gay club, one and a half month ago. His name will be N. and I feel okay and satisfied when I'm with him. I'm really glad I met him and I like him more from day to day. The previous weekend we spent the whole weekend together in an apartment. He's 28 years old and he works in a political party, which is an awkward thing in our relationship, cause I don't like politics that much. :)

That's all from me for now. I will try to write more soon, cause I have a lot on my mind to share with you. I missed blogging.

Thanks for reading,

B.

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